Obituary

Year 2112

It is to inform you about the sad demise of our poor old uncle Mayank Jain after he was poisoned by his long time blog readers. It was said that they all showed symptoms of mania and hyperexcitability before they all made a secret alliance and poisoned him. May God bring peace to their souls.

He was born in the small town of Hisar in the wild state of Haryana in 1989. People have demanded God to be a little more strict in quality control since then. He was a constant headache for his teachers at Campus School at Haryana Agricultural University, for about 18 years after which he moved on to a medical college because the school-teachers were too exhausted to keep up with him anymore. He used to pretend that he is a very good actor. His delusion was even more aggravated by the few awards he got for his plays which he was said to have bought by bribing the judges and telling them stupid jokes.

Later on he became a fine old man, with a santa-claus like belly, but he never had a shabby beard because of his time with the Army. He was a self proclaimed philosopher and often boasted about how good a doctor he is. May God bring peace to the souls of his patients too (for most of them committed suicide later on).

 He is presently survived by three cats, whom he picked up off the streets. All of his thirteen wives had left him because was able to piss off all of them eventually. They are doing fine with his twenty six children separately.

Let's pray for his soul. Lord Almighty, may he rest in heaven forever ! (And never send him back again... pleaassse )